Table Talk: How clear financial boundaries can empower your teen's college path

Let's face it, parents start worrying about paying for college as soon as they know they are going to be parents. But it often feels so far away, they defer investing or planning until suddenly...bam...you have a highschooler and the clock in ticking. The stress builds as cost of college has skyrocketed and parents are caught between supporting their kiddos dreams, goals and education, and having to consider extreme measures like refinaning a house, not investing in retirment or depleting savings to figure out how to pay for it. Parents, with good intentions often revert to "see what happens" encouraging their student to apply to dream schools and figure it out later.

Applying to college is stressful in everyway for both students, and parents who are anxiously awaiting and wondering how its all going to get paid for. In doing what we think is right for our kid, we actually do an injustice. Can you imagine telling yourself, "it doesnt matter how much a house costs, find the one you want, and then worry about how to pay for it later." Sounds crazy. But that's not far off from the numbers we are talking about. Of course we wouldnt do that! We start with an understanding of our boundaries.

We dont have to pay for all of college. We CAN if are able AND WANT to. But having a blank check isnt want empowers kids to start their adult lives. When parents know their finanical boundaries (we have X dollars to give you, on Y timeline, with Z responsiblity on your part) then kids can find their grove and take responsibility for themselves. And the sooner they know this, the better.

Juliana Trivers is a college coach and is up close and personal with the parents, the students and the boundaries between them. She has seen all the scenrios play out and she's here to talk about how clearly defined and communicated financial boundaries is the thing that both you and your teen actually need most during this process.